After getting hit by a car, I faced a choice on the Wellington Cycling Group's Facebook page: share my story and endure a barrage of negative comments from anti-bicycle trolls, or remain silent. This experience sheds light on the impact of hostile online interactions and the power of user-controlled spaces like Nostr, where I found a more welcoming environment. We need to figure out how we handle these digital challenges and the importance of creating a space for free speech AND safe online communities.